Do want to be right or happy?

Red Hot Momma’s like to be right.  In fact they love it.  They love, love, love to be right.  It makes them feel good.  Smart.  Competent.  Being right chases away all those nagging doubts about how good she is at mothering multiple human beings and anything else that keeps her awake at night.

Yes.  Being right is goooood. 

Until it isn’t. The farther this Red Hot Momma makes it down the road of Holy Matrimony, the more sure she becomes about a few things.  Namely, we can’t always be right and happy at the same time.  It’s true.  Sometimes, okay, many times, we just have to swallow our pride and go on down the road.  Dying to self, I believe it’s called. 

This isn’t a popular concept in any generation.  Especially mine, the tale end of Gen X.  We have been told we can do anything we want.  With whomever we want.  Whenever we want.  As long as it makes us happy.  Speak up, stand your ground.  You deserve better- so take it.  Or make it.  Rah Rah Sis Boom Bah!

What happens then when two Gen Xer’s get married?  Each demanding a public declaration and or flogging of the partner deemed to be “wrong”.

Fireworks.  Not the good kind that leave you sweaty and satisfied.  The bad kind that leave you shaking and certain you have inadvertently married the Anti- Christ. 

So we wrestle with ego and God.  Whining to whomever will listen, “But I am right! Darn it!”.  Somewhere along the road between marriage and divorce one must decide if it is better to be right or be happy.  This is not to say that there is nothing that is worth going to the mat over.  Just very few things. 

In this Red Hot Momma’s marriage, there has been near blood shed over stupid things.  Like are Nick Nolte and Gary Busey the same person?  (Nope) Why does the caged bird sing? (NOT getting near this one)  And many, many wrong turns and detours that ended in tears. At least one of us.

Red Hot Momma’s have to make the call.  Is it really worth it, in the end? Does it matter that this person you have yoked yourself to doesn’t have a working knowledge of or appreciation for 1980’s punk rock?  Does it matter that he gets lost every time you drive through Memphis?  Will the world continue turning if she leaves her wet towel on the floor all day?

Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?